A Life Update

the only thing certain is change

Hello reading friends ~ it’s time for a life update, don’t you think? I wasn’t able to get this part written before yesterday’s (100% self-imposed) publishing deadline, but due to kid needs I was up super early today and had a delightfully open block of time.

yesterday evening after some much-needed rain

It’s feeling fall~ish here in southwestern Wisconsin and I keep trying to capture the beauty in photos but I have never once done it justice. Some things just need to be experienced and savored in the moment, I guess, but I won’t stop trying to freeze them for posterity ~ as I get older, I find that “no pics, didn’t happen” is frighteningly real. I tell my kids when they whine about all of my pictures that I need them so I don’t forget, and I’m not joking. When I try to remember the baby and toddler years, all I have are a few distinct moments and a general feeling ~ pictures are what take me back to exact moments and experiences, and they help me fill in holes.

Speaking of exact moments, I’m currently living in one that I don’t want to end, but I am so achingly aware of its fleeting nature. Our oldest is a senior in high school, and while her future is yet undecided, the reality is that she will be entering a new phase of life ~ one that involves a whole lot less of me ~ in less than a year. Another family member will be undergoing a medical procedure in the coming months that I’m 95% sure will go well, but I have twinges of fear about, so am making sure to notice everything about them and savor how life with, and for, them is now.

Image source: memories and such

And on the professional front, I absolutely adore my new position and am savoring every second I have in my wonderful new building, in my new (favorite) library and with my new delightful work family. The fact that I love it so much is ironic given that my building has recently been revealed to be on my district’s short list of schools under consideration for closure after this school year. It’s a really tough situation for four buildings full of staff and students, with a lot of internal discourse and public sentiment that is adding to the stress and anxiety for all. We won’t know our building’s fate until January, and our personal fates much later, so I am using every single one of my tools for mitigating my anxiety to attempt to savor my current situation while also preparing for a second semester that may be incredibly bittersweet, and a professional future that is completely unknown.

this playlist from Calm is my everyday go-to. it decreases my heart rate instantly

With that being said, I won’t be talking about work here again until I know whether my building is closing or not. I have been really working for years now on the concept of nonattachment, and this might be the truest test of all when it comes to detaching my professional identity from my true sense of self. As a wonderful colleague reminded me when I made my brief detour into high school teaching, I will be a librarian forever, regardless of whether I work in a physical library space. I am holding that very near to my heart right now.

I first read this one in print years ago and last week listened to the audio ~ loved them equally!

I am finding peace in revisiting favorite books, noticing the world around me, and doing my damn best to be there for my kids whenever I possibly can. Sometimes conflicting schedules don’t allow me to always be there for every kid at every moment, but by being home to pick up kid #3 from drama club and getting her a quick dinner so I can go to the first half of kid #2’s soccer game (my husband is usually able to be done with work in time for the second half) and back for kid #3’s bedtime, I feel like I’m doing my very best. Kid #1 and I are planning a trip to Chicago in October for National Portfolio Day (an art and design college thing), so my husband will be the one there for kid #3’s *mandatory* club basketball meeting. We do what we can!

I’m also really working on managing my reactions, and I believe my husband and I deserve MEDALS for our recent casual and kind handling of the baseball that destroyed the windshield of our only car (out of 4!) with air conditioning (during a heat wave!). The funny part about that is the kid who hit said baseball will never realize how we COULD have reacted, so chalk it up to yet another unsung parenting achievement! And thank the goddesses for insurance.

deep breaths and a smile ……. in and out …….

So, that’s where things are with life right now! And this newsletter may be evolving over time, but I’m deeply committed to sticking to my Saturday morning publishing schedule with extras thrown in as the whim strikes. And speaking of whims, I have a special seasonal bonus dropping next Saturday for ALL subscribers ~ I hope you enjoy it!

I’ll leave you with my new favorite bookish song that may be written for kids by my favorite children’s musical artist, but is for the reader in ALL of us. I’m so happy you’re all my book buddies!

That’s all for this edition, my friends!

Thanks for reading and supporting my work,

I love to hear from readers, so please do reach out to me with questions or feedback at mindfullibrarian@substack.com . If we aren’t already connected on Instagram and Goodreads, I would love to see you there as well! If you’re new here, don’t forget to check out the archives!